Making Graft Great Again

King of Planet Pardons Convicted Felons, Very Grateful For Dem Dirty Dollars

Photo by Lance Reis on Unsplash

In these crazy days, it’s not really news that presidents pardon the unpardonable, but when it’s so shallow, swinish and flagrantly immoral, it does tend to make you sit up on your hind legs and sniff the currents for the stench. Behold the reeking details as retired Air Force Colonel Karen Kwiatkowski serves it up hot …

https://www.lewrockwell.com/2026/01/karen-kwiatkowski/government-and-fraud-go-together-like-peas-and-carrots/

Thanks KK, and thanks for your service to the people, not the empire. Well done essay as always, especially the parting shot about heading for the exits. Regular readers of this boutique stack know that I think state Secession is the only exit left for those of us who cannot skedaddle to Uruguay. Be my luck, even if I could, the great Orange Father of Everything would probably soon kidnap the usual suspects down there, fire the rest and rename the place Trumpagonia. There goes the neighborhood, Alice.

Note to the Donald … you might want to consider unpardoning the felonious friends so they can rightfully serve their time … it’s only fair to those of us who abide by the law. You don't want your minions thinking it’s okay to break the law, now do you?

Come to think, if generalized lawlessness did break out, you could really march your little soldiers and natty guard pieces all around the board with even greater reckless and strategic abandon. I would think a lively game of Risk would be a nice break from that exhausting 12-D chess you’re always toiling on.

And by the way, you may want to stop changing the names of things whenever it suits your whimsical fancy. Renaming the Gulf is embarrassing even to Narcissus. Not to mention how silly you gonna look when AOC changes it back to Gulf of Mexico, come January 21, 2028. In the meantime I’m calling it the Gulf of Texas.

I gotta hand it to you, though … the little crumbs for the plebs, like that whole taxes-on-tips thing you got going, is keeping the maggers well-distracted from the larger picture of criminal pardons and the bazillions of their tax dollars electronically flipped to wretched reptiles like those who can play the piano with their teeny joystick. Or the satanic yahoos who can convince the world it’s okay to turn wrong-colored children into pink mist. Just wondering … do we the taxpayers also get to finance the bulldozing of the blood and bones so that we can build back better? Asking for a legally plundered friend.

I guess it really don’t matter … loyally blinded fans wouldn’t see the light even if you were the father of the most heinous bioweapon ever invented, that rained down the most death and destruction ever and perpetually … as long as they get to hear how big and beautiful it is and how many lives it has saved. Just don’t stomp any puppies, they hate that.

I guess that’s all for now, but you may want to stop kidnapping presidents of other countries. It’s reminding people of the same oily chicanery committed by your lovable predecessors in places like Libya, Iraq, Syria and countless others. And if it’s the voting machine fraud you’re worried about, you can always try hand-counted paper ballots. While you’re at it, drive a stick shift and walk the beach, get yourself grounded.

Oh well, at least you makin’ Dubya, Barry and Slick Willie proud. Reminds me, we all figured pal Crooked Hillary would be indicted by now. I’m sure you’re working on it, in between flailing the cannon across the deck in every direction from South America to Greenland. Speaking of which … I guess Denmark better watch their mouth, lest you change their name to Land of the Little Frozen Weenies.

Best of luck from Lone Star country,

~~ Doc

“The point is … you can’t be too greedy.”

~~ Donald Trump

And as promised, a photograph from my collection …